The Strange Interview

Well it was more like a recruitment drive for a spy, sort of at least, as usual I was kicked out of my old job and was again searching for a new one, which was when I came over an extremely vague ad on the newspaper just stating one line ‘employee needed’ well that sure interested me, and applied for it, and surprisingly enough I was visited by a man next day and was handed a bit note stating ‘meet us at so and so’ instead of a formal letter. But who cares I lifted my head to say ok to that guy but before I can do that he was gone (strange). Well finally the day arrived and visited that extremely vague company whose full name is ‘General Incorporated Business Solutions’.

At the offices I was met by a rather stocky ‘army major’ type who introduced himself and called me by my name even before I could say anything, and then showed a short introductory video all about the company, I think featured a cartoon man with a moustache, explaining the benefits of something called ‘secondary Rhombic Thinking’ (whatever that meant) but I noticed a series of other things I noticed, first there were only three co-interviewees with me, second everyone was observing me instead of watching the video. Then I was handed a form and was asked to fill in, it was ‘an aptitude test’.

The questions were baffling: ‘have you ever played tennis professionally?’, ‘do you wear a watch….?’ I tried my hardest to give the type of answer they might be looking for but it was impossible to work out what that might be, one part of the test required me to draw a tortoise, for which colored pencils were supplied. After I had finished, he took my paper and asked me to wait for 15 minutes. Then a different man called ‘Morris’ (first name? last name?) came in to the room, and with a completely blank face said, “Congratulations, you’ve got through to the next stage, we will be contacting you with the details.’ And literally pushed me out of the office and went back inside. When I left I realized I had forgotten to ask one very important question: ‘what is the job’.